Mar. 25th, 2002

reynardo: (Default)
I've dug out the bike.

I was given it for my 33rd Birthday some 4 years ago, and after some abortive attempts to get it up the incredibly steep hill between our house and the rest of the world, it was returned to the shed. When we moved to this place, it went under the house and I swore I'd get it out soon.

Soon has arrived.

The tyres are (miraculously) staying up after I pumped them up on Friday. I started with down to the first corner and back on Friday morning, up to the highway and back Saturday afternoon and around the smallest local block on Saturday afternoon.

Sunday I rode all the way to the end of this street, up the hill and around back to here. I actually got to within 5 gears of top gear (although the speed terrified me) and although I had to get off and walk up 20 metres of the steepest part of the hill, I rode all the rest.

When I got home, I could barely stand up. My thighs are sore and tired, and I was only just able to stagger to a cool bath and a nap.

I'm taking the poor bike for a service tomorrow. It's a trifle rusty and it doesn't always like changing gears. It's a basic K-mart one (but still lovely) and I'm determined to have it in the best running condition it can make. And I'm determined to use it twice a day until I'm able to make the train station and back, and can then use it to get to and from Uni. If this doesn't get me fit by my wedding date, nothing will. And if other people can give up smoking, then I can get fit. In comparison, it's nothing.
reynardo: (Default)
I wondered about this. I was corresponding with a guy in the US, who was stuck in an iron lung and had been for many years. And then, like so often in my life, I let things slip because if I let them slip a little I feel guilty and can't get back to it.

I admit I've let friendships go, lost contact with wonderful people, missed opportunities, all because of this bad habit.

And now I can't get back in touch with him. He died in 1999, about a year after I lost touch.

I'm angry at myself, pissed off at myself, annoyed at myself.

Resolution

I will do better.
I will not let my guilt paralyse me.

I will accept responsibility for being stupid, and not let it make things worse.

Dammit.

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reynardo

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