I used to make my websites by hand...

[reynardo]

... and I was worried that they would look amateur.

Until I saw sites like this wedding clothes site or my favourite, Demonbusters, complete with midi of "The Blood of Jesus".

Warning - do not view if nauseated, easily squicked, or if your eyes work at all.

Known sins: Bad midis, horrid backgrounds, long pages with the actual information waaaaaaay down the bottom...

Comments

[feodora.livejournal.com]

OMG


I have now Eye-Cancer.... the colours!!!!! But the content is horrid as well.

[muzukashii.livejournal.com]

Thanks for that. Suddenly my life doesn't seem so bad.

[frou-frou.livejournal.com]

ouchie....and the auto play music. I didn't get to look at the second link, a few frantic scrolls looking for the mute button was as far as I got.

[shadow-5tails.livejournal.com]

The thing that amused me most about the DemonBuster page (being mercifully free of MIDI playing, presumably due to FlashBlock), was the bit down the bottom reading:

"DO YOU NEED SKIN CARE OR MAKEUP PRODUCTS
or want to start your own home business ?"

and clicking that link:

"If you would like to start your own home based business,
find out about this very reputable company,
or TO ORDER PRODUCTS or get a free sample,
contact me by email at
BloodOfJesus AT demonbuster.com"

*snerk* It seems a little at odds with the rest of the site, really.

Also, I kinda liked the wedding site's choice of music. Autoplay is impolite, yes, and the site itself was an eyesore, but the music could've been much worse...

[fluffy-cloud.livejournal.com]

"DO YOU NEED SKIN CARE OR MAKEUP PRODUCTS
or want to start your own home business?"

That part made me laugh as well. I was clicking on links at random and I had just read the link where it was saying that vanity was bad and we really didn't need all those wrinkle creams. Then I read that blurb at the bottom of the page.

I also liked the totally random bit about apple cider vinegar being a good deodorant stuck in at random.

[misshavisham.livejournal.com]

*snerk* It seems a little at odds with the rest of the site, really.

Unless of course the skin care and makeup products are actually made of the blood of jesus.

[shadow-5tails.livejournal.com]

You know, I hadn't thought of that. *grin*

I wonder where they found enough blood, though? And suddenly I find myself thinking "And here is the Skull of Jesus as a little boy..."

(My ever-helpful partner, mind you, suggests the Spear of Destiny - sure, it might end the world, but it's got yer cosmetic ingredients, yay!)

[trixtah.livejournal.com]

FrontPage had a lot to answer for.

But a clean hand-coded website looks a lot better than some of the dysfunctional crap that's going on today. If I see Flash used for navigation elements and headings again, I'll scream. (I'll be doing that when I go back to work, because our intranet uses flash for some of the headers/links that change when you click on them. Trouble is, if the flash doesn't load, neither does that navigational element. (mutter mutter rant)

But the midi thing is so retro. Actually, that's one of the things about the Snopes site that isn't great, although I think with their redesign, they've gotten rid of the worst of the rubbish.

[malada.livejournal.com]

Demonbusters! OMG!

Candles attract demons! Paisley prints attract demons! EEEP!

Wow. So bad.

-m

[reynardo.livejournal.com]

But not the town of Paisley - only the pattern, because it comes from India, but before that from the teachings of Pythagorus who is a Mage and a worked with demons...

Dammit, does that mean I shouldn't learn geometry?

[scascot.livejournal.com]

Women learning things attracts Demons.

[nefaria.livejournal.com]

There's a legend that Pythagoras had to flee from battle, and the only escape route required him to trample over bean plants. Bean plants were sacred to him, so he died instead.

Also, Pythagoras would have you killed if you found out that the square root of 2 was irrational, because that was an occult secret (even though it's one of the simplest proofs by contradiction in history).

[quatranoctal.livejournal.com]

Gah. If you want not-particularly-good webpage design combined with godawful web*site* design, try http://www.dancindownunder.com - pay particular attention to the Page Title and URL. (And for more fun, check out the list of dances and try navigating one of those pages, too!)

[nefaria.livejournal.com]

Loved the ad at the bottom of Demonbusters:

DO YOU NEED SKIN CARE OR MAKEUP PRODUCTS
or want to start your own home business?
Men's products are available too.

D'oh, someone else noticed it first, never mind!

[quizzicalsphinx.livejournal.com]

Oh Demonbusters. I haven't thought of them in ages.

Best of all, the midi that plays constantly is explained at the bottom: it is a song that demons particularly dislike, so if you feel the need to turn off your volume as you view the page, it's likely that you, too, are possessed by demons!

I wonder if this means that demons also dislike Muse and My Chemical Romance; I always feel the urge to mute that when I encounter it on MySpace pages.

[misshavisham.livejournal.com]

Oh dear. I can't decide which one is worse. They are both so very very bad for completely different reasons. Jeebus.

[jolly-oddness.livejournal.com]

THAT CAN'T BE REAL.

Oh, gods. My eyes! And Keira Knightley too, like it could get any worse!

[lordstorm.livejournal.com]

....and I thought the TimeCube site was bad. *plug ears*

[shadow-5tails.livejournal.com]

YOU ARE EDUCATED STUPID!!!!

Also, TimeCube has gotten weirder still since I last looked at it:
"To worship a religious/academic defied Queer (God)as your progenitor, equates to spitting puke in your Mom and Dad's face - a real beastly act. "

*blink*