Dear Mother Nature.

[reynardo]

Those people singing "I'm Dreaming of a White Christmas" don't mean it. Honest. At least here they don't.

This is the Southern Hemisphere. Christmas means 40C and sweating over Christmas Lunch and scanning the sky for smoke, and the joy of icy cold drinks, and playing cricket in the back yard, and Dad's zinc-creamed nose, and the cicadas so loud you can't hear the bloody Messiah playing again.

It doesn't mean snow.

I know you're only aiming for the mountains to our east. That's still too close.

Stop it.

Send it north. I have friends in the UK and USA who would love it. Really.

No love,

Rey.

Comments

[17catherines.livejournal.com]

Don't say that! I think Melbourne definitely needs a white Christmas!

[moxie_man]

What she said--please send it my way up here in the Maine wilderness. Our tourism industry is suffering thanks to last weekend's RAIN storm, which wiped-out the nearly 2ft deep snowpack in snowmobile country and caused flooding along most of our major rivers*.

Please send us the snow. WE WANT IT!

*--Kennebec River in our town crested 1.7 meters above flood stage. If you recall your visit here, that isn't very much--just enough to submerge half of downtown's parking area and get a lot of basements wet. However a few businesses in the next town downriver were completely submerged, including a popular night spot that is poorly named (The Warf). They go underwater so often, they should probably just call it the Sunken Boat or something.

[panacea1.livejournal.com]

If I ever get rich enough to buy out that pub, I'm going to paint the facade mustard and rename it the Yellow Submarine.

[harliquinn.livejournal.com]

I'm half surprised that some of the lower bridges didn't wash out! The one bridge I've stepped over was rather low to the water...

[loganberrybunny.livejournal.com]

We do not mention cricket here at the moment. =:S But we don't need snow sending our way. Got snow. =:P

I'd actually hate 40 °C. The hottest I've ever experienced is about 35, and that was too much really.

[freyaw.livejournal.com]

Sand can be white...

[wingedkami.livejournal.com]

Speaking as someone in the UK, please don't send it here. We can't handle it! We're rubbish!

[nefaria.livejournal.com]

Send it all to Buzzy's house, he never gets any.

I figure if you can just send one square mile of snow that's one inch deep, and pile it all up, you'll be able to entomb him deep enough that he'll starve before it melts enough for him to escape.

[mr-figgy.livejournal.com]

Don't send us any more, or we'll have to declare the Highway 402 a disaster area in the immediate future. Just ask Tricky, who got stuck on it all thanks to snow.

[sly-girl.livejournal.com]

Send it to Thailand. That'd surprise a few people.

[harliquinn.livejournal.com]

You know - it's really bleak here when it's 20*F during the daytime and horrifically mushy and muddy brown outside. A frozen muddy, but muddly all the less. We had to worry less about loosing needles off the holiday tree than getting mud all over it this year. :(

Honestly, I could go for the zinc sunblock, cricket, and the occasion smoke distress. Maybe my father is right. I should go live in Australia.

[quatranoctal.livejournal.com]

With the weather in Canberra (and I suspect Sydney) at the moment, you'd be forgiven for thinking it was a "Wet Christmas". If that's the alternative, I'd take a White Christmas any day.