reynardo | Dreaming through the problems.

Sick. Tired. Flu-ey. Not really awake. Hot-and-cold. I thought I was Ok but aren't really. I might beg off early tonight - or coast through the rest of the evening. Shame, though - it's quiet enough that I ought to be able to make it.

Weird dreams this afternoon - definitely not suitable for children. Involved activities best left between consenting adults and in the pages of assr. I seem to have little problem slipping into dreams in a very short space of time - I used to dream on the train to work, which only had a 45 minute journey. All that stuff in the sleep journals about how 2 hours sleep was necessary for dream-sleep - what do they know! Mind you, some of those dreams on that train - my poor fellow-passengers...

I've learned over the years to take notice of my dreams, as they either indicate a worry or a decision of mine, or something I am picking up from other sources.

Many years ago, when

da_norvegicus's father was sharing living space with me to help look after the lad and things were very very bitter between us, I had a weird dream. It had two parts - in the first, he put his arms around me, apologised for being such a bastard, and was sweet and tender towards me. The second part had him packing his gear and leaving. I realised that I wsa picking up on the two parts of his mind - whether to apologise and make peace or to leave, and t'was soon afterwards that I worked out he was being so nasty to me because he had chosen to leave but didn't want to be the one to make the move - he was forcing me to throw him out so he could point and say "it was her fault".

Now please don't get me wrong - Tony and I are good friends now,and he has more than made up for the first year. I would never have invited him and his parents to my wedding if we weren't good friends by now. But it was from that dream and others that I realised how much my dreams are trying to tell me. Whether it's sorting out the priorities that are swamping me, or pointing me towards someone I need to talk to, or just helping me admit the roaming of my eyes, those dreams have been brain-sorters of a very useful type.

I found myself once having a similarly erotic dream about a workmate, someone I had only thought of up to then as a friend. If only I had twigged that my dreams were trying to tell me that he might have been more.

At least now I know to take notice of what my subconscious is telling me. I know to acknowledge the message even when I can't do anything about it. I am going to file this afternoon's id-adventure under the "maybe, perhaps, unlikely, but worth replaying" section of my dreams, and pull it out to remember at other times whilst falling asleep.